Whose Was the Blame

nt I appeared to be borne down by some outside overwhelming power. I did not know whether that power was for good or evil ; I only felt that I had entirely changed my nature. This feeling at my heart was mixed pleasure and pain. I continually contrasted in my mind the two evenings I had with Nadine. Each one of her words, and the expressions of which she had made use, came back to mind, and I felt as if I saw her and heard her more distinctly than when I was in her presence. " Why do I love her ?" I asked myself. Surely not because she is beautiful ! I have met many more beautiful girls, who have not moved me in theslightest degree. She has never given utterance to anything at all remarkable ; indeed, she is very much like other girls, and yet she has crept into my heart, she has found a chord there which had hitherto remained untouched. Altogether I felt in the most confused state of mind ; I was only clear on one point, and that was, that I wished to marry her. And I reflected how beautiful life would be if my hopes in this respect were realized. I was not yet able to paint the rosy future in clear colours to my mind : I only felt a general impression. It seemed to me as if some magic chord had been struck in my heart, the separate notes of which I was unable at present to distinguish. But I knew the tones were fresh and pure. I seemed to have torn myself completely away from my past life, as if I were looking down upon it from a higher plane. I saw muc...